David's Posts

Government orders plebiscite on Marriage At First Sight
"It’s trending every night, for better or worse, and we could only dream of that kind of popularity in an election year.”
Arnott’s continue ‘Aussie Legends’ line with Aerogard-flavoured Shapes
The snack has already received a ringing endorsement from the Prime Minister, who insisted that they be served at citizenship ceremonies nationwide.
Moro Bars prepare for months-long stay in back of fridge
“It’s a pretty sad state of affairs when you’re the last one in the bowl, especially after Nan has come and taken all of the Turkish Delight.”
Video game violence blamed for sudden spike in Stagecoach robberies
PARENTS groups are up in arms after an unprecedented increase in stagecoach robbery and hog-tying since the release of Red
SJW confined to bedrest after two days of ‘world-changing’ Facebook posts
"Now I know what a racehorse feels like - the ones that don't get shot I mean."
Global warming sole cause of summer heat says moron
"I hate being so sweaty all the time! That's why I don't do any exercise," Reggie complained.
Islamic woman attends mosque dressed as Pauline Hanson
"I think there’s a genuine security threat in allowing people who look like this to be out in public"
Man suspected of Nazism after buying 30 Tiki torches at Bunnings
"I'm just having a bunch of people over for a barbie and I fuckin' hate mosquitos"
Pistol and Boo call for ‘humane execution’ of Barnaby Joyce
Or at least get him desexed
Coca Cola planning to match Pepsi with their own culturally-insensitive advertisement
"I had the idea for Santa Claus spraying Coke out of his sleigh all over Africa and making everyone white and middle-class - that went into the 'maybe' pile."
The Chaser