Former billionaire Harvey Norman has today been forced to liquidate his chain of retail outlets, after a shock downturn in free government handouts saw the company forced to rely on ‘selling things’ in order to stay in business for a change.
“The problem is all these entitled taxpayers think they should be getting schools and hospitals for free simply because they pay a few thousands of dollars in taxes a year,” complained Harvey today. “You can’t seriously expect someone like me to dip into my savings to fund my business. I’m not a charity for God’s sake.”
The news comes as a particularly harsh blow to the Sydney Morning Herald, who will now be forced to start paying journalists again to fill the space left by the missing 24 pages Harvey Norman ads every day.
Meanwhile, members of the Australian public have suggested Harvey try cutting back on coffees and avocado if he would like to own a business.