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“Peel here” tab a huge fucking lie

Shrink packaging companies across the country have today been raided by the ACCC, following reports they have been misleading consumers into believing you can open their packaging with anything less than a welding torch.

“I just wanted some sliced ham,” said local victim Ken Fakeson. “I just kept pulling and pulling but nothing was happening. Then, eventually a little bit went up but just tore off instead of opening it. Is this some sort of sick joke?”

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Chaos occurred at the packaging factory as our reporters attempted to reach the CEO for comment, where he managed to avoid our questions by hiding behind a door that said ‘Pull’.

Our team has reached out to authorities but they haven’t yet been able to investigate the company, telling us in a statement that they’re currently dealing with another situation regarding scissors being held in packaging that requires scissors to open.




The Chaser